Fresh News 4-14-2006

Real Root Beer is alcoholic!

Many gamers forums have been torn to shreds by the "real root beer is alcoholic" vs the "real root beer is non-alcoholic" flame wars. Here to put this to rest is the Gamer's Buttload resident expert, Rootimus Maximus, a world renowned root beer brewmeister.

Rootimus Maximus:

It's simple, all you done gots to do is to mix the ingredients and bottle it. It has yeast in it and the yeast produces the carbonization and alcohol. It helps to set the bottles in a warm place like in your attic, where all the really smart root beer brewers age their root beer. Don't be a yoink, drink REAL aged root beer that as alcohol in it.

And there you have it Gamers. Take it from Rootimus Maximus, real root beer has alcohol in it.

Today's News 4-14-2005

Psychonauts Release Date Pushed Back 3 Weeks!

In a horrifying revelation by Double Fine Productions, Inc it was made public this morning that the much anticipated release of Psychonauts this April 19th has been pushed back by 3 weeks due to a bug in the base code of the program that sends your private information such as Social Security number, credit card and pin number to the Double Fine Productions main frame computer.

An embarrassed representative of the computer gaming company explained, "It was a simple typo in the CD Key verification code where the line of code should have said:

if CD_KEY = look_up(database_a.cdkey, psychonauts, online) then play_game else exit

Where the simple accidental typo made it say:

gosub exploit_fool(rape_mode, mastercard, visa, SSN#, moms.bra.size, find_all_CD_keys)

As you can see this could have happened to anyone. "

Gamers Buttload has also learned that several of the beta testers had their heads asplode after playing the game for 7 consecutive hours and there is a debug team working on this as this article goes to press.